i wish in october

  • I Wish in October (9)

    9 After sitting on the bench and looking at the bags and ducks, we went on our walk through the park. I remember the very pleasant afternoon; the trees were crispy, the sky behind them gleamed chilliest blue, the earth was damp and packed in smooth in the woods, runny and puddled in by theContinue…

  • I Wish in October (8)

    8 I did not take control of the season. I did not pursue a thing; I waited for it to happen. When the thing didn’t happen, I would continue waiting. I would become quite tired. There was a lot of waiting, and a lot of being tired. Somewhere between the American Halloween and the lateContinue…

  • I Wish in October (7)

    7 I remember being ten and describing to a friend an atmosphere, an aesthetic: ‘It’s like sort of punk Halloween, you know.’ He didn’t know. Nobody did or does. A very specific thing I was trying to speak about: a bedroom, a little like my own, decorated, black window, a harsh white skull on aContinue…

  • I Wish in October (6)

    6 I was in my late twenties. I remember the park that I worked near, which was not the same park as the pondless plastic bag park, was very beautiful in the October time of year and at any time. I remember sitting in the park and reading as much as I could of TheContinue…

  • I Wish in October (5)

    5 There was a Halloween I spent in America. The suburbs were as they had been dreamed into me by projectors and screens. I do not believe I saw a single yard fronting a porched house that did not have a gossamer draped plastic skeleton hanging off of a skeleton draped tombstone, or a child’sContinue…

  • I Wish in October (4)

    4 When I was very young, and quite tangibly frightened by the idea of blackened orange night, and what it allowed, and of witches on sticks, and of cackling garden bushes and the caped man we had seen from my bedroom window stalking the distant graveyard, and the breath we had heard in the unoccupiedContinue…

  • I Wish in October (3)

    3 At a friend’s on another older Halloween I had given someone a shaking fright when I rose up suddenly from a bed in the darkened room they had walked into. They had laughed and said that I scared them, and then they were gone. I had not intended it. I was in costume asContinue…

  • I Wish in October (2)

    2 We used to go to a Halloween show at the park, when I was young; it was the same park that I sat in a long time after, pitying the ducks in their wasteland pond. It was the closest I came to the longing crux of the Eve and my expectations of it: weContinue…

  • I Wish in October (1)

    1 I wanted to be inside of that television orange. I was sat on a bench by a pond, the great volume of which had dried out, leaving turned mud and thinning puddles, and submerged trash and plastic bags, and threshed cans of Lilt, Coke, and Tango that blew in place of reeds and lilies.Continue…